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Say This - Not That (Hobbyist - Provider)

Updated: Sep 18, 2023

As with ALL my Blogs & Posts - these suggestions are mine personally based on my time in the hobby. All providers have their own opinions & interpretations of what they Do & Do not like. This is merely my perspective, and observations from some of my provider friends.


• HERE'S A LIST OF COMMON REQUESTS •

And the Correct way to ask ......


• SAY THIS:


Hello Harlow, I'm "great client" & I was hoping to connect with you on "such & such time" on "such & such date." Please let me know if that works for you & any additional information you may need in order to book.


I look forward to meeting you soon.


• NOT THAT:


Hey!


What's up?


What's good?


Are you free?


- Providers get Multiple inquires & texts Daily!


*** If you keep your messages concise and to the point - it is Much, much more likely things will move forward in a positive manner & will equate to a better session.


**** Not to mention.... If someone texts me these questions, these are my "go to" responses


Hey!

-Hay is for horses


What's up?

-The sky


What's good?

-Tacos


Are you free?

-No, I'm expensive


I think you get the idea


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• SAY THIS:


Hello Harlow. I'm interested in booking with you. If you'd like to check out my profile 'About Me' you can learn a bit about who I am and what I enjoy to determine if we'd be a good fit.


I look forward to hearing from you.


• NOT THAT:


Do you offer 'A'


Do you offer 'A'


Do you offer 'A'


*** The Point is -

DON'T EVER ASK PROVIDERS EXPLICIT DETAILS.

Not only will they Not respond, they'll most likely block you.


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• SAY THIS:


Hi Harlow. I'd like to compensate you appropriately for your time. Is there a website, or alternative place I could find your considerations?


• NOT THAT


How much?


$$$$$$?


Roses?????


Rates?


- Most providers have rates Clearly listed. Look at the ad & profile first and in the event the rates are unclear be respectful & inexplicit.


*** No provider is willing to speak specifics on ANYTHING OTHER THAT RATES FOR TIME.


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• SAY THIS:


Hello Harlow. I have an unexpected, small window of free time & would love to connect if possible. If it's too short of notice I completely understand. I look forward to hearing from you.


• NOT THAT:


I have the next hour free. I've messaged a few providers. Whoever texts back the fastest gets the $$$$.


- First off ...

This is Never a good idea to say to Anyone, not just a provider. Nobody wants to feel like they're somebody's 2nd or 3rd choice.


*** It's important to remember that providers are PEOPLE.

They have feelings like everybody else.


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• SAY THIS:


I'm on a limited time frame. Is it acceptable to have a shorter session, or is that not something you offer? I completely understand either way & if that's not on the table, I'll plan ahead better next time and schedule a regular time slot that works for you.


• NOT THAT:


QV?


BNG?


Fast pop?


- It's astounding that I even need to say this, but if you've Never gotten acquainted with a provider, seen them prior, or saw an "ad" or "menu" with a short visit offered.....DON'T ASK in a manner that makes you sound cheap & disrespectful.


*** It takes time to get comfortable & equally as much time to prepare, shower & clean up both before & after appointments.The length of the actual appointment itself - doesn't change the amount of effort to make it possible. So be courteous, be understanding & it will be reciprocated when the appointment does happen...


Whether then, or at a future time.


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• SAY THIS:


Hello Harlow, I'm going to be in the "such & such" area for a business trip next month. Would you be willing to allow me to use your name as a reference? I look forward to catching up soon when I'm back in town.


Thank you for any consideration!


I appreciate your help.


• NOT THAT:


Hey girl it's "me", can you message this chick at "***** number" and tell her I'm a good guy.


Can you look at these ads from "so & so" and tell me if they're legit?


- It is a huge disrespect when hobbyists ask us to 'vet' other providers. And while it's perfectly acceptable to Ask for a providers help with being a reference for a hobbyist - it is Never acceptable to ask, or expect us to do your homework.


*** This is an ADULT hobby. We all should be behaving as such. Don't expect a woman you've seen twice to "comb the internet" helping you get a date! Seriously, this actually happens.


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• SAY THIS:


I noticed a very sexy outfit you'd worn in one of your photos and I found it completely intoxicating. It would be Amazing ( if you still have it ) to have you open the door & greet me wearing it.


If not, of course I completely understand.


I look forward to meeting you regardless.


• NOT THAT:


Can you wear something super slutty?


Open the door naked!


- If there's a particular outfit that's been featured in photos, it's entirely possible the provider might own it. Most gals will happily oblige in outfit requests & even encourage it! But be tactful in how you ask.


*** Asking a provider if you can bring them a gift of lingerie to be worn at an appointment is Always a nice touch. Not to mention a win win for both!Just be sure to clarify sizing if it's anything that's not stretchy & forgiving for most sizes.It's kind of a buzz kill for most if it's incredibly too small, or so big you can both fit in it!



I'll add to this list as new thoughts surface



Nameste

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